7.24.2005
Goodbye Blue Sky-Pink Floyd
started a post the other night about mom... glad I didn't finish it. It's funny, actually. I have nearly 20 blogs that have been started and never finished.
Much like my trains of thought.
I think for ¿WTH?'s birthday, I'll post all the unfinished posts. How exciting.
Come Sail Away-Styx
funny how music can change moods.
maybe I'm just moody?
funny how you'll hear one (no longer popular) song OVER and OVER again in a short span of time... for no apparent reason.
Eric Clapton, I adore your skills, darling... but if I hear
Wonderful Tonight one more time this week, I'll die.
in a tragic accident.
someone will attempt to kill the stereo and inadvertently shoot me.
like the sheriff.
but not the deputy.
oh no.
*ahem*
speaking of music.
and lost trains of thought -
After waking up to Rick D's on my stereo this morning, I feel as though I should compile some form of "Worst Songs of the Now" list.
top 5?
10?
8 it is.
So here you have it.
In obvious order.
I'll give you the short, then elaborate. If there is going to be justifiable thoughtless criticism put into this, I want you to go along for the ride. But for pleasurable viewing and referencing purposes, the raw list comes first. If you're completely offended and plan on bombing my inspirational lava lamp... continue no further.
Other than that, feel free to cringe.
In fact, if you would like to cringe and take a digital picture of yourself cringing, send all pictures to me via e-mail or aim.
I will proudly post them.
*******
8. An Honest Mistake - The Bravery
7. Helena - My Chemical Romance
6. Fall To Pieces - Avril Lavigne
5. She's No You - Jesse McCartney
4. Since U Been Gone - Kelly Clarkson
3. First - Lindsay Lohan
2. Untitled (How Can This Happen To Me) - Simple Plan
1. We Belong Together - Mariah Carey
*******
~An Honest Mistake - The Bravery
comeon. I'm not even a fan of The Killers, but the sound is identical. #8 for lack of originality.
~Helena - My Chemical Romance
Three cheers for... oh wait. three shots in the head for
another pseudo-rock/punk...bandish type thingy. So sick of this carbon-copy crap. #7 for obvious reasons.
~Fall To Pieces - Avril Lavigne
On an album entitled "Under my Skin", will Avril EVER be in one piece? With lyrics like,
"I can't handle this confusion... I'm unable come and take me away... I feel like I am all alone... all by myself I need to get around this" -- once again, she's captivated us with her depth and insight. For being herself (aside from the canadian factor) Avril takes #6 for... well, being Avril.
~She's No You - Jesse McCartney
Do I really have to elaborate on this one? Just listen. It hurts my fingers to type about it.
~Since U Been Gone - Kelly Clarkson
Okay. Originally, I tried to avoid the fact that she sounds like Lavigne. Then I tried to avoid the phonetic "U" in the title. Then I just got fed up because she ha(s/d?) a great voice. Guess I really just expected she'd do something more than ride on the Limited-2 demographic for success. Pour ze disappointment, Kel gets a nice big cup of #4.
~First - Lindsay Lohan
I listened to Ace of Base back in the day (as did most people) and although
I Saw The Sign wasn't reeking of profundity, at least it was catchy... cute? I mean, comeon. Kids these days listen to crap. And yes, despite the boobs and overdose of makeup, Lohan is a kid herself. For having the worst excuse for a song, voice and lyrics - not to mention an album cover designed to color coordinate with the growing race of ersatzo-punk 12 year olds in this nation, #3.
~Untitled (How Can This Happen To Me) - Simple Plan
Now, picking the top two were very difficult. Oh wait, no they weren't. Undoubtedly Simple Plan has done it again. If ever a song rivaled
Screaming Infidelities for Level-10 Emo Factor, THIS would be it. Because I'm so confused why people actually like this song, I decided to turn to a trusted friend for candid answers.
So here you go. Out of the mouths of IQ:40 babes.
Q: Why is this song entitled "Untitled"?
A: "the title for it untitled is because they want YOU the listener to fill in the blank its also untitled b/c words cant describe it..."
[ahhhhh]
Q: So you like the song...
A: "definetly my favorite sp song yet and its so emotional, it makes me so emo,cry, and want to scream and just runnaway. Its so weird how a song can change ur mood."
Q: Crying?
A: "When I first listened to this song I was all happy and high on caffiene! The when I heard it I turned sad..."
Q: At least you didn't cry like the other guy.
A: "...I didn't resort to crying because I'm unable to cry. I'm serious! I just cryed to many times when I was little to cry now. Although I didn't sob to death, it did remind me of my grandpa's death...my mom was right next to him when he died. I wish I was there too. My mom came home and told me, and I cried my heart out. That was the last time I've cryed. I haven't cryed for 5 years now."
[crickets]
Q: Anyone else?
A: "I was walking down my road once, (blowing off steam from a fight) And I had just bought the CD. I had it on my discman, and as the song was playing , I was thinking about my life, my obsessions, my fights with my grandparents (my legal guardians), my cuts, my tears... Everything flowing to the beat of a single song...Everything that had ever occured to me... All in those lyrics.."
[...]
#2 for the usage of crickets.
::DRUMROLL::
~We Belong Together - Mariah Carey
Oh Mariahhh...
Mariah, Mariah Mariah. Loss of words. This song has graced the number one spot on the Top 100 charts for 17 weeks. So why would people be so enthusiastic about it? Hmmm.
It's quite possible that the record sales were so high because everyone who dished 18 bucks thought the album belonged to Beyonce. In fact, I'm pretty sure Beyonce strolled by the record store and thought, "MAN. I look good! Oh... oh wait. No. That's Mariah."
Silliness aside, shall we examine a cross section of the lyrics?
When you left / I lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe / Come back baby please
We belong together
Who else am I gonna lean on / When times get rough
Who's gonna talk to me / Till the sun comes up
Who's gonna take your place / There ain't nobody else
(ohhhh baby babyyyy)
We belong together.
Because this is the number one song, I figure it's only just that I parallel my disgust for the song with an equation. [Math being of equal disgust]
Backup singers(oohh baby baabbyy) + Mariah(typical squealing voice squared) - Fan base(x) =
Simply merde.
BUT.
x=?
the world (or at least I) will never know.
because an unknown variable is present, Mariah takes home the golden #1.
So there you have it. The top 8 "Worst Songs of the Now".
I will say though, on my rampage through the Top-100 lists across the nation, I found some pleasant surprises!
I was REALLY shocked to see Alkaline Trio (alk3) coming in at #89 for
Time to Waste. Brings back some crazy days. Rocked to sleep by the rhythm of
From Here to Infirmary.
Unfortunately it was just below Simpson's
These Boots Are Made For Walkin', so all feelings of nostalgia were quickly negated.
Also a pleasant surprise was
Home by Michael Buble.
Very nice. A+ for channeling Dean Martin/Frankie S.
Other disappointments?
The influx of the clones. Jason Mraz, Daniel Powter, Gavin DeGraw.
Even more disappointing? I really dig a couple of Gavin's songs.
Anyways, I'm peeling away from the screen now.
I've got to go wait for Parts 37-45 of
In The Closet to be released.
"Dude...It was
so the police officer!"
Keep it plastic.
I'm out.
lj [11:46 PM]
