12.16.2003
ok, finals this week...and for some reason, I DONT CARE.
...have yet to study.
so... i made an 88 on my term paper. yeahhh yeahhh. writing humorless paragraphs within pre-set guidelines about topics that could put ANY man to sleep completely cramp my style. "ONE should contemplate thisss...ONE should consider thatttt...ONE should KISS MY ASSSS."
now, don't get me wrong...an 88 is not horrible...but once again. when you look at an 88, you think...HMMM...her grade strangely resembles someone else's in the classroom...and that person is A COMPLETE MORON!
("how
do you spell animal?")
Everyone who thinks i deserved a better grade say "I".
*laura watches intently as the masses raise their hands and shout "I" in perfect unison*
Ok, so on that note...ish, recently, i was pondering as to what my first plan of action would (will) be as president/world leader one day. Hmm...would it be that all incoherent, redneck, truhuck driving imbeciles be stoned? Or would i create a national Strongbad day? hmm...maybe i should create an island...and put alll the stupid people on it...and strategically map out where each camera would go...so that all the intelligent people could flip on the TV anytime and watch them attempt to figure out how to survive!
OoOo...i think i have something here! First...we UPS every stupid person to an island...created by me. (and we will not use standardized testing in order to accumulate the necessary data. Each person will have to suffer through a rigorous verbal interview.) ACK! cart before the horse! before we can send them to the island, much prep-work is needed! we will need to place hidden cameras in strategic locations. (bush and i use strategerie to get things done) NEXT, we plant certain human necessities all over the island...such as: food, matches, water, magic markers, etc. NOW we can dump all the stupid people on the island, and VOILA! instant reality TV. Every time you start to feel stupid, you just turn on the Tv, and watch as an ignorant teenage boy attempt to solve a riddle...so he can eat!! now THATS television. and HEY! we could also take bets! "who will be the first to gnaw his own leg off?" The last man standing will be the REAL survivor...
his prize? he could come dwell among the intelligent people. (we would just see to it that he is unable to reproduce)
OoOo...and another twist! Along the lines of the riddle thing...the harder the riddle solved, the better the prize received! Then we would KNOW that the last man standing is, in fact, the most intelligent man!
ALSO, we would have a SUPER RIDDLE - leading you to a gun! He who figures out the riddle...acquires the gun, and goes on a shooting spree (leaving only himself) truly deserves to dwell among smart people!!...TADA! instant winner.
ANYWAYSSSSSS...back to what i WASSS talking about. (i am so ADD) what SHOULD my first plan of action be? oh hell, i'll let you have an input... [see message board]
ok. my brain has logged off "sharing mode" for tonight.
i feel that this is best.
so i leave you with...
M: I wish people were like dogs...
M: I wish I didn't have any tits until I got knocked up
M: so I wouldn't hafta deal with them just hanging there all the time
M: I mean, dogs tits are just little bumps until they get humped.... then they get all big and juicy
L: WOW
M: and after the tits have served their purpose, they go away again
L: just little bumps until they get humped
L: lol
M: well, honestly!
L: *thinks of a way to make that rhyme*
M: hehe
OH, and if you didnt catch "THE DUMPLES" shirt worn by me today...then give it up. One day, you will acquire some coolness, and stumble across SB. you will then think to yourself, "WOW...why couldnt i have been more like laura...wearing kickass shirts made by mary the great instead of this abercrombie shit with my initial on it..."
(and it doesnt mean that i'm part of some club thats been "dumped by guys alot" ...quite the contrary Miss Family Dollar)
as for now,
~iM OuT~
lj [9:10 PM]
